Monday, July 5, 2010

Chapter Twelve Finished

Chapter Twelve, titled "A World of Wonders," is behind me at last. Best part of it, aside from the appearance of a ghost? The eels scene has been put back into the book. I am quite pleased with that. I think it actually works, too. Yay, me.

wordcountometer = 42,540!

Here's a brief excerpt:

Hamlet stood, put his back to the oven wall for warmth and faced Cornelius, Voltemont and me. He rubbed his hands together and looked beyond us.

“You know how I rode forth at my father’s side, down the road to Copenhagen.”

“Aye, my lord. Four days ago.”

“Has it been four days? Well, the army rode south and we made good time, getting to the hunting lands north of Copenhagen by evening. We made camp there under the great firs. A family of foxes was seen making its way along the western edge of our camp. It was all very picturesque and the army was in a jolly mood. I slept quite well that night.

“The next morning our scouts found Baron Jaaperson’s troops and we assembled our forces to meet them near the lake at Westfold. You know the place, Horatio. We waited in the trees atop the hills as Jaaperson and his men crossed the field below us through deep snow. We were at a great advantage, and when the Baron’s troops made the foot of the hills they were all exhausted, man and horse alike. General Bernardo gave a shout and led his Swiss lancers down the slope just as the clouds parted above us and the brave eye of Heaven shone down upon the ensuing battle.

“My father and I then rode forth with the main force of men and like some great many-headed hawk we fell upon our prey. My father with his generals pursued Jaaperson and his knights while the rest of us hewed our way across the enemy ranks until arms and heads and bloody gore lay all about. My father was in his fullest glory, and I saw what it is to be king of Denmark.”

Hamlet paused and closed his eyes, his left hand raised to touch the bruise on his face.

“How were you injured, my lord?”

He opened his eyes and smiled, looking down at our feet.

“I am ashamed to admit it,” he said. “It was no part of the battle. After we cut down our enemy I rode up the hillside to see if Copenhagen was visible to the east. My horse stumbled and I was thrown. I landed badly, though I dare say my injury is but skin deep. I am wholly unbroken. Even so, my father sent me back to Kronberg and so my esquire and I rode north where I found that my old friend Horatio had been shipped off to Hven. I commanded a boat to bring me here and last night you did discover me. That’s the end.”

Cornelius and Voltemont congratulated the prince on his valiant showing in his first battle and demanded to hear more.

“Tell us of the men you slew,” Cornelius said.

“Did you battle with knights, or men-at-arms?” Voltemont asked.

Hamlet answered them, using much florid language that invoked blood and honor and bravery but left out anything in the way of detail.


A bit rough, et cetera, caveat lector.

8 comments:

  1. Ooo, 42,540 words. What word count are you aiming for?

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  2. I like this a lot, Scott, and congrats on the word count progress. This concept has such great commercial potential; I hope that you are finished sooner than later. :)

    Also, it's been so long since I've commented - though I try to read everything through Google Reader - and never noticed the photo: I like that too.

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  3. I love this line: "...while the rest of us hewed our way across the enemy ranks until arms and heads and bloody gore lay all about. My father was in his fullest glory, and I saw what it is to be king of Denmark.”

    What a commentary on what it is to be King. Nice.

    The new picture is cool.

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  4. Tara: I know, it's exciting! I feel like I am standing still on this draft, which is why I keep such close track of the wordcount, so I can prove to myself that I'm actually going pretty quickly. I'm guessing I'll land at 90-100K words when I'm all done. This draft should also need less in the way of revisions than the previous version of this book. I hope!

    Weronika: Thanks for liking this and saying it has great commercial potential; let's hope my agent feels the same way when he sees the damned thing at the end of summer!

    Who has time to comment these days? I read a bunch of blogs but mostly I'm just lurking. You're more likely to hear from me on FB than on your blog.

    I like the photo. I think I'll use that as my official author photo. It's my lucky tie, you know.

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  5. Lois: That's the most important line in the scene! A later scene will turn all of this action on its head in an ironic manner.

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  6. I love irony. Good luck making it shake things up.

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  7. Fantastic! I love how you tell all this through dialogue but it's as if we're there. And congratulations on the word count! It seems like you've flown a bit after passing 20k. :)

    I must admit, though, every time I see the name Voltemont my mind converts it to Voldemort. Damn Rowling.

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  8. Ivana: My goal is now 1,000 words a day until I finish the book, so that I can be done by my birthday at the end of August. A finished draft will be my present to myself. I hope.

    Damned Rowling indeed. But Shakespeare got there first, so I'm sticking with Cornelius and Voltemont. They were ambassadors in "Hamlet" but they're my comic duo because in my fictional world, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are serious characters.

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